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Guilty by Ai Okaue

A Full Review


(Note: Guilty is intended for mature audiences age 18+. 🔞)



Guilty v. 1 manga cover shows Sayaka being held by her piece of shit husband

Serialized digitally on Manga Okoku from September 2017 to October 2022, Guilty (Guilty: Nakanu Hotaru ga Mi wo Kogasu) is a drama thriller manga illustrated and penned by Ai Okaue. Kodansha published the series physically under the Be Love imprint in Japan. Guilty is 13-volumes long, and it has been adapted to a live TV show, starring Yua Shinkawa (as Sayaka Ogino), Teppei Koike (as Kazuma Ogino), Yurika Nakamura (as Rui Oikawa), and Keita Machida (as Keiichi Akiyama). The TV show aired in 2020 and ran for 1 season, 10 episodes. (The show hasn't been licensed in English.)


Kodansha USA published Guilty digitally from October 2019 to December 2023. As of this review, the series is only available digitally in e-book and streaming format. Guilty is available for purchase on Kindle, Nook, Apple Books, Google Books, Bookwalker, and several other stores. The series is available for streaming on a variety of platforms too including MangaPlaza, Libby/Overdrive, and Kodansha's K-Manga app. (Casual reminder that public libraries exist, and they carry e-books.) The one good thing about Kodansha's digital manga is accessibility, the amount of choice you have in reading and/or purchasing the series.


Kodansha describes the story:

Affection, betrayal, desperation-love between grown-ups is never a rational thing.
Sayaka, age 35, has lived with the perfect husband for ten years. Perfect, that is, except for his disinterest in raising a child—she wants one badly, but just can’t come clean to him about it. Instead she unloads her frustrations on her younger friend Rui at their favorite bar. They trust each other enough to talk about almost anything—but Rui has a secret she can’t even let Sayaka know about!

WHAT.


A.


ROLLER.


COASTER.


RIDE.


Whoo-boy, where to begin? Reading Guilty was an exhausting, yet exhilarating experience. From the number of twists and turns to the number of characters and how they relate to one another, it's enough to make your head spin. Keep a corkboard, index cards, string, and a pen handy. You'll need it.


Before diving into the story further, I think it's best to reiterate that Guilty is a drama, thriller, and romance in that order. This isn't a fluffy, cozy, or romantic lovey dovey series. This is a series for people who like drama, like all-caps drama, melodrama, DRAMA. If you like angst, this is for you. Likewise, this series is great for fans looking for a thriller with a romantic twist. Lastly, this series is intended for adults. No red flag, green flag discourse bullshit here. They are all red flags that need therapy because boy, do they got issues. What kind of issues? The laundry list kind of issues that can take up a whole page with content warnings.


Content warnings include infidelity, cheating, lying, stealing, manipulation, baby trapping, fertility issues, abortion and pregnancy loss, parental death, parental abuse and neglect, parental abandonment, domestic violence, mommy issues, child abduction, minors committing crimes, prostitution (including underage), mental health issues, suicide, murder, arson, and jaywalking. (Okay, I kid about the arson and jaywalking.) Oh yeah, there’s also some normal stuff too like nudity, sex, smoking, and drinking. Just let this be a blanket warning for what's to come, all non-spoilery too because a few of these happen multiple fucking times. So, if you are a sensitive reader, you might want to sit this one out.




 

Story Overview & Characters


In the author’s own words, Guilty is "a sordid tale between grown men and women." It's a story about marriage and motherhood too. The story is also jam-packed with love themes, such as forbidden love, familial love, unrequited love, and of course, romantic love. Simply put, Guilty is a story about how one woman is just living her almost perfect life with both eyes closed when it gets rudely upended by the last person she expected, her “friend.” Guilty has a lot of characters, and all of those characters are certainly…culpable for one thing or another. However, the main characters are Sayaka Ogino, Kazuma Ogino, Rui Oikawa, and Keiichi Akiyama. Guilty begins (and ends) with our main protagonist Sayaka Ogino.


Sayaka is a 35-year-old career woman. She works at her dream job as an editor for a women's fashion magazine, and she's been married for 10 years to her "perfect husband" Kazuma Ogino. Kazuma works for a major ad agency, and Kazuma is the type of man who'd remember and celebrate the day he met Sayaka with a cake from a 5-star bakery. He's the guy who'd cook fancy dinners for her and listen to her about her day. However, he doesn't want a child, which is the one thing Sayaka wants. Sayaka vents her frustrations to her friend Rui Oikawa at their favorite dive bar Cheaton. (Laugh now, but I didn’t take the hint.)  


Rui is Sayaka’s 30-year-old casual bar friend, and she’s a mysterious one. She has a deadbeat boyfriend and lives around Cheaton. Rui and Sayaka talk about everything, well, almost everything. Lastly, Keiichi Akiyama was Sayaka’s first real boyfriend and love from high school. Through her work, Sayaka meets Keiichi again. This unexpected reunion brings up memories and feelings that she’s kept locked up for years. With the stage set, I’ll walk you through the big arcs of the story. No major spoilers ahead.

 


Guilty v. 7 Rui wearing negligee holding her glasses by her teeth She looks manic


Volumes 1 - 7


So, Rui’s big secret, alluded to in the plot summary, is that she is intentionally fucking Kazuma behind Sayaka’s back. That’s right her “deadbeat boyfriend” is Kazuma. (Rui lies. A lot.) Kazuma doesn’t know Rui is Sayaka’s friend, and of course, Sayaka doesn’t know that Rui knows Kazuma. The audience is given this information in volume 1, first chapter. In fact, the first chapter ends on this juicy bit of information, and the end of volume 1 ends on Sayaka unknowingly walking into an Italian restaurant for work only to run into Keiichi again after 20 years. These reveals encouraged me to keep reading. Okaue has a knack for cliffhangers and twists. So, make sure your reading device is well protected in case of accidental table flips.


Before you can wonder how long before the other parties know of the affair, the answer is not long. At the end of volume 2, Sayaka finds out about the affair, and she confronts Rui. (Kazuma is also made aware of the connections and dealt with. Not enough to my satisfaction but dealt with, nonetheless.) I’ll admit that I was hesitant about this story going into volume 2. I wasn’t exactly looking forward to reading several volumes of back-and-forth gaslighting until the inevitable showdown with Sayaka possibly having an affair with Keiichi as payback. Thankfully, Guilty isn’t that type of story.


Reading volume 2 made it abundantly clear that you’re reading a thriller manga. Rui is the mastermind behind a lot of coincidences, chance meetings, and other strange happenings. She’s spun a nice web with Sayaka at the center and her assistants, pawns, and victims filling out the nodes. Not even Sayaka’s job is safe from Rui’s clutches. Rui’s schemes go just beyond simple revenge. She hates Sayaka and really wants to destroy her life as well as those around her. The question is why? Volume 2 also makes it abundantly clear that everyone sucks here. Everyone, including our protagonist Sayaka. (She sucks less though.) If “likeable” protagonists are a must for you, I’d hope you’d make Guilty an exception. I was seriously hooked from volume 2 onwards.


Volume 3-4 fills in important back story for a few characters as well as introduces us to Keiichi’s family which includes his wife Miwako and his son Keita. Volume 3 also brings up the issues Sayaka and Rui have with their moms. Also, Sayaka has terrible friends. The end of volume 4 ends on an important cliffhanger. Volumes 5-7 fill in more background info as well as give us a front row seat to the destruction of Keiichi’s marriage and Sayaka’s frayed relationship with her mother. Volume 7 is the mid series climax, and it ends with a shocking deadly event.



Guilty v4 spread shows Rui holding up a photo of Sayaka asleep in bra and underwear on 1 page; on the other page a train passes by Sayaka

 

Volumes 8-13


Volume 8 opens 2 months later after the shocking cliffhanger, and the story only slows down for that volume. It might be the volume that makes some people quit or throw their Kindle. XD But, I urge you to keep going. Volume 8-9 introduces us to Dr. Izumikawa, a man who has ties to both Rui and her mother Akina and proves to be an instrumental part of Rui’s plans. Volume 10 is the big showdown. Finally, we learn why Rui is so hellbent on destroying Sayaka’s life, why Rui has so much rage. Volumes 11-12 were exposition heavy, and volume 12 includes another time skip, a 2-year time skip, which I’m not a big fan of.


Lastly, volume 13 wraps up all the loose ends, and the story surprisingly ends well for most of the characters. A few characters were even redeemed in the end. Sayaka definitely gets a happy ending. She earned her happy ending as well as a lot of the other characters.


Overall, I think Guilty had the right number of volumes. There was enough packed in to justify its length, and while volume 8 dragged and the huge exposition dump spread out between volume 11-12 was annoying, I had a really good time reading this series. I just enjoyed watching Rui causing chaos and wanting to see the world burn and take people down with her, and I enjoyed watching Sayaka finally come to terms with her feelings and act upon them. Sayaka was an affable character exuding confidence and all smiles on the outside when really, she’s still that scared, miserable teenager waiting for her dad to return and her mom want to live for herself. It was great to see how both characters break free of their mother’s influences and break free of the destructive paths they were on, and I hope you’ll enjoy the series as much as I did if not more.  





Conclusion


Simply put, Guilty is a sleazy story about love between adults. It’s also a story about betrayal, marriage, and motherhood. Guilty is a wild ride, a melodramatic soap opera, and a thriller. The series is complete at 13 volumes and available on a variety of digital stores and streaming platforms. I highly recommend Guilty to anyone looking for a drama thriller with a romantic twist. I also recommend it for anyone looking for a manga intended for adults. Finally, if you happen to be a fan of Ai Okaue’s writing and earlier shoujo works like Bambi to Dohle, I’ll recommend Guilty to you too. Much like Natsumi Ando with Something’s Wrong With Us, Ai Okaue has grown with her audience. Love to see it.


I also love Guilty so much that I had to include it in my honorable mentions on my favorite manga list, and I own the series via Kindle. Kodansha USA has no plans of releasing Guilty physically as of this post. However, Kodansha USA will be publishing Ai Okaue’s current series Roar: A Star in the Abyss (Roar: Naraku no Heroine) in print in Spring 2025. Roar is a revenge thriller manga presently serialized on Palcy, and it sounds just as fucked up as Guilty. I can’t wait to read it. In the meantime, read (or reread) Guilty.

 

Check out Guilty via Kodansha’s site here. (You can read the first chapter for free there too!)



Guilty v.13 shows Sayaka on the front cover smiling


What to read next after Guilty:

  • Roar: A Star in the Abyss by Ai Okaue (to be released in print by Kodansha in Spring 2025)

  • Something's Wrong With Us by Natsumi Ando (read my part 1 review of volumes 1-7 here.)

  • 1122: For A Happy Marriage by Peko Watanabe (digital-only title via Kodansha. Check it out here.)

  • Me, My Husband, and My Husband's Boyfriend by Ayano Ayano (only available via MangaPlaza as of this review. Check it out here.)

  • The Golden Couple by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen (not a manga; a psychological domestic thriller novel; the "perfect" couple's marriage unravels due to infidelity; 5 stars. Great audiobook too. Check it out here.)


Happy Reading!


(P.S. This is my 100th blog post! 🎉🎉🎉)

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